The Power of Music II

Although music has a strong effect on a single person, music has a different purpose when many people are making it or listening to it. This weekend, my school is putting on A Chorus Line, and I am a part of the cast. The cast is very talented, and I am very glad to be a part of such a wonderful group. Last night, we were all talking about this together in a circle during rehearsal. We all focused on one person, and we raised our hands to talk about that one person. Well it finally got to Paige Hauer. She is a senior, and when she was a sophomore she became very close friends with my brother through the spring musical, and subsequently I got to know her as well. We are pretty good friends today- after co-starring in the fall musical, participating in two speech team events together, performing in show choir together for two years, and being in A Chorus Line together. Through all of the work that she has done with me, she has really changed me and bettered me as a person. She has a lot of street smarts, and she often has the solution to everyday situations which I may be troubled with. I think I've learned a lot from her. Music has truly made this friendship possible. If I hadn't gotten involved with theatre or show choir at Kennedy, I would've had no way of knowing her, and I feel that I would've been a much different person.

Anyways, so I started to talk about her during the circle time, and what I said is paraphrased above. After saying I began to cry. Not only did I cry, but I couldn't stop crying for about five minutes. Well, by that time I was laughing and crying because I couldn't believe I was crying. I mean, I can't remember the last time I cried, so when it happened I just thought it was so pitiful or something. I couldn't believe I was so emotional, and I guess I just started chuckling. Before that moment, I didn't think that I would cry over another person (except if something really tragic happened), but not having some friends around next year isn't considered tragic by most people. I felt so sad though, unbearably sad. The only time that I had ever gotten that emotional over leaving my friends was when I was in fifth grade at the end of The Music Man. I remember that day so very clearly. The last show was over and we all got out of costume. We all hugged each other in the lobby-like area backstage, and I began to cry as I gave a hug to Tara Jeanne Vallee. Besides the funeral of Papa and hearing the news of Bubbie's death, it was the saddest day of my life. Everything was coming to an end. I think I've always had a fear of things coming to an end. Perhaps that's part of the music and theatre business.

You see, performing in a show is great, and it makes me feel very happy. However, every show comes to an end. I don't remember specifically, but I think that subconsciously I am afraid of endings for this purpose. I think somewhere in my childhood I became very good friends with people and then I never spoke to them again. I know that's what happened with The Music Man, but it also happened with Tommy, the Paramount's Follies, The Sound of Music, Cinderella, Seussical, and many other shows that I've been in. It's sad to think that many of the relationships you make in a show are erased the day the show ends. I think that this loss is a big part of who I am. I am not a guy who has a best friend, I just have a lot of good and okay friends (I've also never had a girlfriend). I think there may be a part of me that is afraid of the former kind of friendship, because I am afraid that it will end and I'll never talk to that person again. No worries though, I'm happy with what I've got.

I guess I have gone off on a tangent, but not really. You see, I am changed as a person as a result of the power of music. In my first post on the Power of Music, I talked about how great music can change a person. But more fully, music has the potential to unite people, move people, change people. Music has shaped my life, and I cannot think about what my life would be like without it.